Absence

I have been a little rubbish at updating the past few weeks as I have been temping and I had no access to the internet. To be fair though, there wasn't a great deal going on anyway. I had a hen-do to go to last week which was good! I didn't know anyone really though, but I made the best of it. I left at about 11ish and went on to my bf's brothers fancy dress party. That was a brilliant night! I went as a hooters girl. Some of the outfits were really good! The birthday boy went as Zorro!

The past week has been okay but I have been a little worried this week about money and things. My confidence is getting a bit low at the moment though. I am not really sure what to do. I wish it was something that I could just ignore, but it's affecting me and my thoughts on my relationship. I am starting to think that I am going no where and that it's my fault because I am not professional, glamorous or domestic enough to please him in the long run. I don't really know why I am having these thoughts. I tried bringing up a few of my issues last night with him, but it didn't have much effect! I think I am trying too hard, maybe it's time to back off... He's always thinking about work at the moment and I am taking a back seat, so maybe I should just stop shoving my face in his and trying to make him notice me, because it's only making me feel worse when he doesn't!

I do love him though and I think it's worth hanging in there, for the next few months anyway. I am so crazy about him, I think that might be one of the reasons things get to me so much. It's hard to see people around you going places with their bf's and gf's, especially when they have been together 2 minutes, but I just have to keep reminding myself that people are different! I just managed to land myself a commitment phoebe! It doesn't make me love him any less!

Oh well...

I start a new temp role next week! I am really looking forward to it! It;s right by my friends work, so I think we wil be going to lunch most days which is lovely :) I hope I have access to the net in this new place, it's been horrible without it!

I think I am going to put on one of th DVD's I bought!

Ciao for now!

LS xx

The need to relax

Today was another of those up and down days. My agency messed me around again. After telling me about that great job yesterday, they told me today I wasn't suitable and that it was back to the drawing board. That upset me. I really feel like they are taking the piss out of me now. I do them a favor on something and then they take advantage. I have arranged to sign up with another temp agency next week though so fingers crossed.

I have other stuff to say but I am physically and mentally drained at the moment. I am going to go to bed. I will update again tomorrow.

Goodnight all.

L xx

Tired but happy!

Despite the awful end to my night last night, today was good. I was very quiet in the morning and I was pleased that I was temping and that the people around me did not know me. Otherwise I might have been in for a lot of stick! I just put my head down and got a fair bit done. 

I got a call from my agency today. They have a role working as a HR administrator for 3 months. I really want it as it's much more money than I am on at the moment. I know I can do it. I will have to have a telephone interview apparently. I have no problems with that though. I am always pretty confident on the phone. We'll see what happens tomorrow. I have nothing else in the pipeline at the moment though which is a little disappointing, but fingers crossed!!!

On my lunch, I visited the church. I reflected for a little while and then lit a candle for the people I have lost. My Nanny, Grandad and my friend. I have lost 2 of those in the last year. I have been to the church the past couple of days, it is so calming and makes me relax. I feel totally at peace and stronger whilst I am in there. It's a strange, but wonderful feeling.

Anyway, I am fairly blank tonight. I am tired and bored at this moment in time. I have just had a moment of excitement though, I arranged my birthday. Woo hoo. Can't wait! The invites have gone out! :D 26 here I come!

LS xx

Arsenal Vs Liverpool (Joke!)

Today has been really strange. I was really tired, but I kept working like a trooper. Lunchtime I spent walking around the City churches. One of which came from the nursery rhyme 'Oranges and Lemons'. I was too scared to go in for some strange reason, but after work I returned and sat and said a little prayed for my Nanny & Grandad who are back together again. It was so peaceful... Indescribably calm and peaceful. I was glad I went.

In the evening, I walked home. Stopping off at Waitrose to pick up some goodies for my bf for dinner. It was the Arsenal Vs Liverpool game tonight, which was awful. We (Arsenal) went one up, then Liverpool equalised. It was 1-1 going into the second half. Unfortunately, Arsenal went 2-1 down to a very good Torres goal. Then some phenomenal footwork from young Theo Walcott,  levelled it for us.  Only seconds later Liverpool were given a penalty where Toure apparently brought down Babbel. There was NO contact and should NEVER have been a penalty. It angers me so much. I am sick of being an Arsenal fan! Then my Dad starts rubbing it in, by saying it WAS a penalty when it actually WASN'T. I'd better go to bed I think. I cried after the 4th Goal which came when Arsenal put all their players into Liverpool's penalty box for a corner. I want Barca to win now I think!!!

It has not been a good evening, other than my dinner which was delicious!!!

Enough said I think...

LS xx

Happy and content!

Today has been one of boredom but eventually of great happiness. Work was boring as per usual. I keep telling myself that it's only a temp job and that I am just waiting for the right thing. Temping does suit me at the moment, but I am doing a role which pays peanuts. I do have my freedom and flexibility though, should I decide not to work there anymore. But some money is much better than no money. I have a few things coming up which are going to cost a fair bit of money, like a hen weekend this weekend, a weekend to Northern Ireland, Barcelona in June and Glastonbury. It's not cheap! But I think with hard work and perseverance, I can still do all of those things and more!

The happiest part of my day was this evening when I went home to see my parents and brother. I had a great time relaxing with them. Then on my way home I was talking to my bf who informed me that he's booked a hotel for Barcelona and that he is actually going to treat me (for the second time this year I may add) to the holiday. Could I get better than him? I don't think so. I love him so very much!!! So Barca, here I come Baby!!! Yay...

Anyway, it's been a really long day and I am really tired now. Off to bed for me! Nanight one and all!

LS xx

Accomplishments

I am so pleased with my blog. I haven't much experience with templates and HTML, but with help from a few tutorials, I managed to knock up a basic page. I'm really pleased with it. It's been a pretty good day overall. I haven't got out of my pj's (lol), I have been chilling with my gorgeous boyfriend and my friend bought us tickets for Glastonbury :) How cool!

I have never been to a festival before! I have always wanted to go to Glasters. Jay Z, The Verve and Amy Winehouse are all rumored to be playing. We won't know the line up till closer to the time. I hope it's not a disappointment! The tickets are £165 - NOT cheap. It's just going to be myself and my friend - I have never camped before so I can imagine it's probably going to be hell. I am very excited though! :)

The rest of my day has been taken up watching a little bit of TV, playing some Bingo and being spoilt by my bf. *sigh* Life is hard sometimes ;)


Bingo

The creation of something new and wonderful! (For me!)

Welcome to LeSwan.com. This is a personal blogging site for 'Le Swan'.

Of course Le Swan is a nickname. Anonymous blogging is far more fun and interesting lol. I have had many blogs in the past where I have been found by various friends and worst of all, work colleagues! The friends side of things I am not so bothered about, but the thought of work colleagues knowing what you're doing is a nightmare.

At the moment, it doesn't matter too much though as I am only temping. So I will never be in one place long enough for it to mean anything anyway.

I think it's important for people to have a place of release. Otherwise if theres something that is bugging them, they just build it up inside their heads, like I used to do. So here goes... :)

London Bingo